I can't believe that my baby turned one a couple weeks ago ! I feel like she was just born ...sometimes feel a slight sadness when I look at her newborn pictures , yet at the same time I love watching her grow and learn ! I love that she has a little personality now and is so much fun ! I used to dream of being a mom ... I wanted a little person who would love me and call
Me 'mama.' I wanted a girl that I could dress up and hang out with ... A mama's girl ... And that's exactly what I got . One thing I was not prepared for in motherhood was the intensity of love that I would have for my baby . Nothing can really prepare you for that love ... An unimaginable love . It's a love that makes you no longer be able to listen to stories of children starving , abused , dying , etc ... Without shedding a few tears of your own because you can't imagine that happening to your own child . It's a love that causes your heart to break when your child is hurting ... A love that causes you to worry about if you are making the right decisions for your child . A love that grows more each day and makes you feel like your heart may just burst ! Sometimes I look into her little face and feel like the luckiest girl in the world ! My maternity leave ended about a month ago and my heart breaks to think about if I had to go back to work. I tell my husband often but I don't think he will ever understand just how thankful I truly am that he's allowed me to be a stay at home mom . He works SO hard so that I can stay home and do my dream job. Sure some days are tiring , and some days I watch the clock counting the minutes until 'daddy' gets home , some days I think of all the free time that I used to have , and some days I wish I could just sit down and read a book ALL day. But every day I get to wake up to a smiling little face , I get to hear the sweetest giggle in the world , I get to take her to the park and on walks , I get to show her off and feel SO proud ! I get to chase her around , I get to teach her new things and watch her grow ... I get to be her mama and it's better than anything I could have ever imagined . I am so thankful to God for blessing me with my wonderful husband and beautiful daughter ! It's been one of the best years of my life !
